Five Great Reasons Why Eloping Might Be Right For You
Hey, I’m guessing you’re reading this because you’ve at least considered eloping or having an intimate wedding as a possibility. Or maybe you’re just intrigued to see why I believe eloping can be such a great thing.
First I will tell you that “traditional” weddings are traditions that continues for good reason. They are a celebration of love shared between a couple and among those who are closest to them. Sometimes those who are closest to them include their beloved family, their great uncle, and their second cousins twice removed whom they haven’t seen since they were infants, but who’s counting anyways, right?
Let me just take a minute to clarify some details. The word ‘elope’ has some old-fashioned connotations. But the meaning is changing. According to Merriam-Webster.com:
Elope appears to have become shorthand for "small destination wedding," "wedding that is not financially insane," or "wedding that allows us to not invite all the people we would rather not invite."
I consider an elopement or intimate wedding to include just the couple and their officiant with no more than 20 guests. And here’s a fun fact: it is not required to have a witness to be married in Ohio. And what I hope becomes clear as you keep reading is that elopements have evolved. Modern elopements can be bold and exciting.
Let me first tell you that I know all this from experience. I have been married twice, as has my husband. We’ve both had traditional weddings. And when we had the chance to do it again, we chose to elope. And we still say that eloping was the ‘best decision ever’! I’m happy to tell you more about that later.
Now let me get into my first five reasons why eloping is a great idea. Keep reading below.
{Note, I’m going to count from five down to one, because who doesn’t love a good countdown?!}
reason #5: the price tag!
According to multiple sources in the industry, the average wedding in the US costs over $30,000. Let me say that again. Thirty thousand dollars. I don’t know about you, but that’s a lot of freaking money! You rent a venue, you book catering, you rent tables, linens, and dishes; you order custom invitations, design centerpieces to adorn each table, cute little signs, a guest book, a ring pillow, gifts for your bridal party members. The list goes on! Many brides and grooms report that the costs can easily spiral out of control. Couples can actively work to keep costs down through various measures and weddings can certainly take place for much less than average. But one great reason to elope is you can reign in control of the price tag of your big, yet intimate day.
If you’re not concerned about seating, shelter, food, drink, and entertainment for a large group of people you can focus your resources on what will really make your day special for you.
Reason #4: modern elopements have a fresh twist!
Okay, Romeo and Juliet - elopements aren’t what they used to be! You most likely aren’t, star-crossed lovers trying to escape the disapproval of feuding families. Or maybe you are, but I’m not here to judge. The point is, in the past elopements were often seen as a way for lovers to run off in secret and be married away from the potential disapproving glares from judgmental family members, or something like that. But things have changed - big time!
Modern couples have begun to see elopements as taking control of their big day in a whole new way. Whether they choose a destination elopement (that’s what we did. Hello, Maui!); an intimate ceremony in the forest (love this option); or a small celebration in their backyard (so fun and easy); an elopement is breaking ties with tradition in a way that allows couples to pick and choose only what is really important to them. Just because you are eloping doesn’t mean you can’t still choose to add in some fun traditional details.
You may not be sending out invitations, but you can still:
send engagement and/or ‘just married’ announcements to share your good news with those you care to share with.
buy a pretty dress and get a beautiful bouquet to tote along on your elopement adventure.
write meaningful vows to share with your life partner on the day of your marriage.
You can even choose to hold a celebration at a later date by inviting family and friends to join you for a reception at some point after your wedding day to allow them to shower you with their love and congratulations.
Or, you can choose to do none of these things. The point is, it’s all your choice. It’s up to you. There is actually very little required of you to be married (and I will be happy to share more of this information with you if you’d like help in the planning process).
Reason #3: You’re a bit of a wildflower
There are some people who love the planning and problem solving aspects of making big events happen. I do admire those people. Maybe that’s not you though. Maybe you are inspired by simplicity. Maybe you crave a different kind of meaningful celebration of your love. And that’s why you’re here and we’re going to chat about this because eloping is an amazing option.
Do you find that you like to do things a little differently? You don’t tend to follow the crowd? You make choices that are considered ‘outside the box’? Guess what - this is so me, too. Our motto is ‘Live for the moment. Love for a lifetime.” We believe that committing to one person doesn’t mean life becomes boring. Your adventure is just beginning. And your big day can be just as adventurous as you’d like it to be. So how are we going to kick this all off?
reason #2: the focus is on you two, and that’s it!
This is not meant to come off in a selfish or exclusive way. You likely have many people who love and care about you who are thrilled that you are joining your life with the one you love. They should also be thrilled for you even if you choose to tie the knot in a more intimate experience than a larger traditional wedding.
Just think about a few of the things that might detract from your focus on each other. An elopement allows you to forget about dealing with the hungover bridesmaid on your wedding day. Not to worry about sticking to a complex timeline outlining your day minute-by-minute for 16 hours on your wedding day. No worries about the extensive guest list including that second cousin’s girlfriend that you didn’t really want coming anyway.
All your energy is focused on you two as a couple. You can plan your day as you please. You can enjoy the flow of the day and take in the special moments as you prepare to tie the knot. You can add in details that are especially meaningful to you that may have been unreasonable on a traditional wedding day, like stopping for ice cream at the place you had your first date. Or you can choose to say your vows to each other at the spot you went on your first hike together, where you held hands for the first time, where you looked into each other’s eyes and knew you were meant to be.
Eloping doesn’t have to be a city hall wedding. Although that’s a quick and easy way to knock out the ceremony. You can elope on a mountainside. You can elope under a waterfall. You can elope around a campfire. You can even elope in your own backyard. The possibilities are endless, so let your imagination run wild!
Reason #1: you’ll have so much flexibility!
If this hasn’t come through already in the previous four reasons, this should make it clear. When you’re not tied to booking a venue months or even more than a year ahead of time; when you’re not spending a large chunk of change to rent tables, chairs, and linens; when you’re not worried about sticking to a complex timeline and keeping dozens of people pleased all at once, you’ll be left with the freedom to enjoy your day to it’s fullest.
I encourage you to pull out a notebook and start jotting down how you imagine a dream wedding. What feels right to you? Who do you really want to share in that day? Just you and your partner (and your photographer to document all the beautiful moments)? Or a few close friends who will be there to share smiles and wipe away tears as you commit your love to each other? What setting will make it all special for you? What special details would you like included to make it even more meaningful?
I am always happy to brainstorm ideas with you, so feel free to reach out any time. Just keep in mind, I’m a dreamer. I’m always prepared to encourage you to think big. Think bold. Think what will make this day epic for you.
If you’ve read this and still feel like a traditional wedding is right for you then I’ve still got love for you! Let’s chat details! Like I said, the traditions have survived for good reason. And if you’ve had that feeling that you’re ready for a new kind of adventure, I’d love to help you put some ideas together and make your dreams happen!
Also, since you read this far, I figured I’d share one of my favorite photos from our elopement. And keep in mind that we are willing to travel if you have a special destination elopement in mind!
